Raindrops on roses it ain't

So, in an attempt to make myself feel better, less blah (in a twisted sort of its always darkest before the dawn sort of way), here is a list of things that make me sad.
1. When balloons float away.
2. When someone drops a cupcake on the floor.
3. That no one sang me "16 Candles" on my 16th birthday.
4. When it goes too long before it rains.
5. When it goes too long before the sun comes out.
6. When they issue tornado warnings for Doppler indicated tornadoes that turn out to be wrong.
7. The song Hey Jude.
8. The fact that Joe Paterno really has gone past ripe old age and is starting to attract flies without a recent National Championship (or a winning season for that matter).
9. The fact that all the Marx Bros. AND Bing Crosby are dead.
10. That the Democratic Party has been reduced to toddler status in this country.
11. The fact that the one person who could probably make me happy has no idea.
12. That the guy who played Egon Spangler in the Ghostbuster movies got fat.
13. That Episodes I and II sucked.
14. That Episode III probably will, too.
15. That pirates don't exist anymore.

Fifteen is probably enough. I don't need all two of you who read this to go rushing to join me on the University Bridge waiting for the Coke Express to come by....