It's a tit bit nipply out there

So yesterday I had to go out and buy a scraper for my car. I should have been prepared when I was watching the news the night before and Dick Goddard was talking about the Alberta Clipper. You know Cleveland weatherman legend Dick Goddard gets a hard-on every time he says Alberta Clipper. The Alberta Clipper is one of his favorite weather things, besides wooly bears and Nor'easters. So he's going on and on about the Alberta Clipper and all I keep thinking about is what sweater I will wear.

When I got up on Wednesday my car was covered with this snow/ice mixture that I couldn't just push off with my glove (damn that Alberta Clipper). I went to look for my scraper but remembered that I broke it last winter when I tried to hack the glacier that had formed behind my tire that was so large I could no longer turn the wheel (it was a solid block of ice that snapped my scraper in two and was eventually removed with several trips out of my apartment with a tea kettle). With no scraper, I had nothing to do but sit in my car for 10 minutes with the heat on hoping it would melt the snow off of my car.

After work I drove to the store to buy a scraper. I left the store with facial soap, a frozen dinner--but no scraper. I walked all the way out to my car before realizing it, threw a tiny fit in the parking lot, decided I didn't want to go back in because it meant going past Quasimodo the creepy bell-ringer from the Salvation Army, got in the car and drove home.

I went to get my hair cut later in the day, so I decided I would stop at the store to buy a scraper on the way home. My hair looked so fabulous (and my new eyebrows gave me a 'surprise!' look) that I spent the whole time driving home eyeing myself in the mirror and completely forgot to buy a scraper.

After the frozen dinner my mother called: they were stuck in traffic bringing the sister home from college, could I go buy some wine for dinner tomorrow. While I was at Topps trying to pick the best wine from a selection $14.99 and under, I saw them: scrapers, a whole display of them. A tear came to my eye at the sight of them.

I bought two. Just in case.

What has it got in its pocketses, precious?

So the first day of wearing the old winter coat is always exciting because there is a chance that you left something in your pocket for three seasons. Usually its something mundane, like a kleenex, a piece of gum, or chapstick. Occasionally it is your lucky day and you find money: the best days in the world are when you find a twenty. Today, as the temperature plunged after the first artic cold front of the season passed overhead, I put my winter coat on to go to class. After class, as I'm chatting with my professor, I put my hand in my pocket for the first time and felt something unknown. Curious, I pulled it out: it was a sparkly green lighter. My professor looked at me and said "Lady, do you smoke??" "No. This isn't mine, I swear. I don't know where this came from. I must have been holding it for a friend." I don't think she believed me.

I'll be Oola was the last person to wear the jacket.

Pennies from heaven

So I was in the ladies restroom this afternoon when the girl with the chipmunk voice from Local Government class drops some change out of her pocket onto the floor (that happens sometimes when the trousers are slouched around your knees). She giggles, flushes the toilet, exits the stall, washes her hands and leaves. As I finished I happened to look on the ground to see that three pennies--yes THREE pennies--were still on the ground.

I am not above picking change off the bathroom floor. It's not like they fell in the toilet or anything.